Not Dead Yet

Finish of the Carlsbad Sprint Triathlon

I know, I haven't been around lately.  I don't call, I don't write... mostly, I don't write.  Nothing nefarious afoot, I've just been busy.  I bought a house in May (two days after finishing IM St. George) and although it wasn't listed in the paperwork it came bundled with a lot of chores.  I've spent my free time just trying to keep up with the mowing, laundry, and dishes.  I haven't even made it to the big stuff like mounting the television, fixing the water line to the fridge and installing the air conditioner (I'm assuming San Diego will have a summer at some point in 2010).  It doesn't sound like a lot of work for home maintenance, but I'm trying to squeeze it between 40 hours of work, and 20 hours of triathlon training.  It's hectic, but it's workable - and things will be better this fall once the Ironman training subsides.
IM Wisconsin is less than six weeks away, meaning I have about 4 more weeks of tough training.  I just completed a badly needed rest week, today was the first day back after a ludicrously easy rest week schedule, which I still struggled with.  This morning it was 16 miles running, my longest run of the year (since I technically stopped "running" at mile 13 in St. George).  It went.... OK.  I struggled to hit my pace, but finished the run without being too beat up, and ready to tackle the remaining 16 hours of training for this week.
What has surprised me so far in my IMWI preparation is that I'm not burned out.  During the training for both of my previous IM races (and one I trained for and didn't compete in), at some point near the end I just got completely fed up.  I wanted it to be over.  I wanted to just do the race and go home (though I really didn't even want to do the race).  I wanted to go home after work and watch television.  I wanted to put more attention on my career, on my personal life, on myself.  I was doing one of the most selfish things I had ever done (train for endurance sports) and all I wanted was time to myself.  Burnout is not logical, it just sucks for no reason.
Somehow I have avoided that this time around.  All I want to do right now is train just a little bit better, and then toe the line in Wisconsin ready to kill it.  I think having a couple of disappointing performances earlier in the year helped to focus me on what I'm trying to do.
IMWI will be my last Ironman for a little while - I'm taking 2011 off from that distance.  But the plan is not retirement... it's reloading.

Why St. George?

There are lots of Ironman races, and I could have chosen to do any of them. This year I'm doing St. George and Wisconsin. WI I wanted to do because it has a difficult bike course, my strength. Plus, since I dropped out of the race in 2009 I really want to finish that race in '10.
St. George is a different story though. Originally I had planned to do IM Lanzarote, in the Canary Islands. Why? Because nobody has ever heard of it, yet it's possibly the toughest IM course on the planet. It's insanely hilly with 8000 feet of climbing on the bike course (more than Lake Placid) and since it's on an island off the coast of Morocco the heat and humidity are excruciating. I wanted to punish myself. If I was going to do Ironman, I was going to do the most difficult one I could find. I have completed IMAZ, but that's a starter race - for those who want the easiest possible way to their M-Dot tattoo. Unfortunately, Lanzarote fell through. Due to a couple of factors, it didn't make sense to fly half way around the globe to visit the Canary Islands this year. I'll put it on my bucket list.
Then the gods at WTC announced a new race in Utah. It was the same time of year as Lanzarote, and the course looked brutal. In fact, the run course looks ridiculously hard. The weather will probably be difficult as well - not humid, but windy. Plus, Utah is only a days drive from home - no need to pack up Jiminy for a trans-Atlantic flight! So, short story long, that's why I'm headed to St. George in May. I feel like in the realm of IM courses the easy ones (Florida, Arizona especially) should have an asterisk by them - they're just too easy compared to the others. Not that any Ironman is easy - 140.6 miles is a hell of a thing to do no matter what the course. But I'm out to see what I can do on the toughest courses I can find. Maybe I'll find my way to the waters off Morocco one day...
For now, I think St. George is a fantastic challenge. A tough bike followed by a brutal run. All I have to do now is spend every waking moment preparing to have the snot beat out of me on May 1.

A weekend in Utah

Me and JK from TCSD drove out to Utah this weekend to attend the Endurance Corner Ironman St. George training camp. This was organized by Gordo Byrne, a super nice guy, fantastic athlete, top tier triathlon coach, and co-author of the handbook for long distance triathlon. This was possibly the single most important thing I've ever done to improve my training. The weekend basically consisted of workouts, followed by meals, followed by meetings. The meetings were not your typical "guy with a powerpoint talking at you" coaching lectures. These were more like support group round tables where we broke down our days work, and discussed nearly anything with the coaches. The coaches consisted of Chris and Marilyn McDonald, Kevin Purcell, and of course Gordo. As an age group athlete, it was a privilege to train and learn from some of the best in the world.
On to the camp itself, which started thursday night with our first meeting. It was very introductory and got us acquainted with the coaches and each other, and laid out the plan for the weekend. Friday the real work began. 6am breakfast, 7am meeting, and a short drive to the aquatic center for a 9am swim. This was an endurance swim - nothing intense, but a LOT of distance. When coach KP gave us the warm-up (1400 yards!) we all sort of looked at each other and smiled. I swam in the 1:40 per 100yd lane, which was sheparded by Marilyn. She was nursing a hamstring injury and swam with a pull buoy and without kicking. It was impressive to watch her hit the 1:30 target each and every time (giving us 10 seconds rest) like clockwork. We ended up doing 4700 yards that morning, though many of the group called it quits a little early. An afternoon of rest, then we hopped on the bikes for a optional "fun ride". The route was up Snow Canyon, which is not part of the IM course. It was about a 5 mile slightly uphill warmup followed by a 5 mile climb. It wasn't impossibly steep, but it really got me a little nervous. I certainly couldn't do that for 112 miles! At the top of the hill Chris and Marilyn did a quick lecture on descending technique - which we used immediately to bomb down the hill. Chris (the course record holder at IM Wisconsin) was amazing to watch, he flew down the hill faster than anyone - not sure how he did it since gravity was pulling us all down the same! I brought up the rear, I'm still pretty squirrelly on descents. I can't tell if my bike is shimmying or if it's in my head - but I get real nervous these days at speeds above 35MPH. I used to hit 50MPH in my aerobars, but lately that's been too much for me. Anyway, after flying downhill for 10 miles it was out to dinner with the crew, and early to bed.

Saturday was the big day, 90 hilly miles on the bike course. The race course is lollipop shaped, with a 22 mile handle followed by two 45 mile loops around the "candy". We did the loop twice, but skipped the 22 mile prologue. It's basically uphill for 22 miles, but it's a false flat for most of the way. There are 3 or 4 spots that are steep enough to be out of the saddle, but mostly it's just a grind. The road is chip and seal, and it sucks. Not only is it bumpy and uncomfortable, but it also slows you down quite a bit - probably at least 1MPH. Also, you need to stay away from the edges of the road. There is gravel lining the sides that is the same color and consistency as the road, and there are no lines marking the edge. Stray too far over, and you've just sank your wheels into the gravel, and probably crashed. Once you reach the end of the last climb you are rewarded with - nothing. More flat for what seems like forever. Eventually the pavement returns to real blacktop, which is your indication that you've reached the downhill section. The downhill is screaming fast and straight - no switchbacks - and it's quite a nice respite. It doesn't last long though, and soon you're back to the loop start. For me, the first loop went surprisingly easily, and the second loop destroyed me. On top of that, the flat sections at the top of the course became windy as the day went on. Overall, this is a tough (but not impossibly so) bike course.
Sunday was 6am breakfast followed by a 13 mile run - one loop of the out and back marathon course. I am a weak runner, and was in the back from the start of the workout. The course starts out on a false flat, maybe 1 or 2 percent uphill grade. It then turns uphill and you climb for what seems like forever. Then you hit the 8% grade hills. Up and down. Repeat. It's mostly uphill during the first 6 miles, with plenty of up and down along the way. Then you turn around and do the same thing in reverse, which is brutal. You need to learn how to run downhill - I found it incredibly difficult, and was running very slowly even downhill once tired. The run course is extremely tough, and I expect almost everyone to have trouble with it - even the pros.
Here's what Chris had to say on his Twitter:

@Cobrada bike if wisco was a 8 St G would be 9 run if wisco was a 5 St G will be a 10 bike is challengeing run is hard about 9 hours ago from web in reply to Cobrada

I have raced IM wisco,france,placid,NZ,AUS,arizona,canada and many more and St george looks to be the toughest/slowest course so far 2:13 PM Nov 14th from web

great ride today on the St george course. that is one tough sun of a B!

He even went so far as to say that he would consider walking the steeper portions! Though, he also said he can walk at 10 min/mile pace.

Great experience learning the course, soaking up knowledge, and hanging out with some real Tri geeks. The course is scary, but I can't wait to race it! I'd recommend these training camps to anyone - but maybe not the Epic Camp!

The spirit of Ironman is about not quitting - at any speed, that is a lesson worth learning.

Gordo Byrne, from his blog 8/28/2009

2010 Training

I signed the papers (technically I clicked on a LOT of liability waiver "I agree" buttons, and one "submit") and am scheduled for IM Wisconsin 2010. The date is in my calendar, I have a reservation for Jiminy with TriBike Transport, and I've got airline sites searching for plane tickets. I wish I had been there yesterday, but that's done and over with now - time to move forward. With most of the logistics taken care of for IMWI, at least for the next 10 months or so, moving forward means preparation for the inaugural Ironman St. George.
I've got a lot of ideas about how to prepare for St. George, in the next week or so I'm going to make them gel into an actual training plan. That's right, no more ad-hoc training - I'm going to follow an actual plan with regular workouts and meaningful milestones. That doesn't mean I won't do the occasional 200 mile bike ride to Arizona, just that if I do it there will be some method behind the madness.
For now this means I have a lot of reading to do. I've trained for two years now for Ironman races, so I know enough to get me through. This time however I'm not just going out to finish, hear Mike Riley call my name, smile for the photo and collect my medal. This time I'm going to race.
There's a whole mess of ideas on my whiteboard regarding how I'm going to do that, but it boils down to a few big points:

Nutrition: I'm going to hire a nutritionist to help me improve my diet. I eat poorly, and get away with it because IM training burns a lot of fuel. But if I used better fuel to begin with...

Swim: I need some coaching. I want to get more efficient, turn my 1:08 swim from IMAZ into a sub 1 hour swim, and do it without coming out of the lake exhausted.

Bike: My strong suit, but still plenty of room for improvement. I need to nail down calorie and fluid intake while riding, and improve my power. I'm shooting for a Watt/Kg ratio of 3.0 or higher. Lots of climbing - Utah and Wisconsin aren't flat!

Run: I'm a train wreck in racing flats. This is the area I need the most help with, and unfortunately also the area I have the least clue what to do about. I've read Chi Running, Evolution Running and Pose Method. They're all pretty much the same (good posture, lean forward, lift your heels, midfoot strike, fast turnover) which I guess is good - there's no "magic secret", you just have to do it. I plan on doing more technique work, as well as running with a metronome to help with cadence. There's plenty of time before my next race, so it's quality over quantity with the running.

In addition to the big ideas listed above, I'm also attending a course preview and training camp in St. George Utah this November. The camp is put on by Gordo Byrn's Endurance Corner and should be a great chance to see the course and soak in some interesting lectures from people who know IM well.

I've got a BUG

I'm in sunny San Diego today, but my heart is in Madison WI. Today is my first DNF, and boy is it a doozey. Not only did I not finish, I didn't even make it to the start line - I didn't even make it onto the plane. Tomorrow is registration for the 2010 Ironman Wisconsin, and I'm going to be clicking madly to get my spot. There is one race I need to take care of before I get a second swing at WI, but make no doubt about it - I'll be in Madison next September. I plan on washing this bitter taste out of my mouth with fine Wisconsin cheese curds in the finisher's tent.
Today is a tough day for me, my mind is full of all kinds of things I could - or should - be doing. I've got BUG's galore dancing through my mind - Gordo's Big Unreasonable Goals. I've been a little complacent in my training, partly due to things out of my control, and partly due to my own selfishness. Today I start back down the lonely road that defines being an endurance athlete. Today, my eyes shift focus squarely onto May 1st 2010 - but the back of my mind will be occupied with getting back to Madison - and finishing what I start.

Playing the Lottery

As someone with a background in math, I don't play the lottery. I think most people know that the lottery is not a good bet - and I am very aware that the odds are so low that your chance of winning is essentially zero. If you'd like to gamble, you'll find much better odds in Vegas - though you're probably going to lose there as well. So why am I playing the lottery today?
Today I entered the 2009 Ironman World Championships Lottery. My odds are not good in this lottery (2.5%, or about 1 in 40) but that's orders of magnitude better than the California state lottery. Oddly, my motivation for signing up is the same that motivates millions of people who cannot really afford lottery tickets to spend their paychecks on scratch off tickets - desperation. The IMWC in Kona is the superbowl of long distance triathlon. There is only three ways to get there:
1. Get fast. The main field in Kona is made up of 1800 of the fastest IM athletes in the world - those who placed in the very top of their age group in qualifying races.
2. Get rich. You can get invited to the race if you are famous or interesting enough to make a good story for the television coverage. This includes the CEO Challenge, the charity eBay auctions, as well as just being a celebrity.
3. Get lucky. 200 people will win slots via the lottery - 150 from the US, and 50 more internationally.

Obviously my preferred method is to "get fast" - though "get rich" wouldn't be bad either. I'm trying to get fast, but realistically that's not likely. I did IMAZ in 12:29:11, in order to qualify for Kona I would have needed to go about 9:15:00. That's 25% faster, a total of more than 3 hours! I believe I can improve on my IMAZ time, but to get down near 9 hours is maybe not in the cards for me - those are some incredible athletes at that level. I sometimes forget it, but I'm a software engineer - not an athlete. I don't really have a time goal for IM Wisconsin yet - but I can safely state that it won't be anywhere near 9 hours.
So I'm in the lottery because it's the only choice I have. I'm still young, and I have a lot of years of entering the lottery ahead of me, which will increase my odds of making it to Kona someday. In the mean time I'll work on the other two options.

Sophomore Slump

I'm suffering from a mild case of Sophomore-itis. My second Ironman race is looking like it will be much different than my first one. I spent the previous 14 months training hard for my first Ironman, and I was focused on that goal like a laser. It was easy to stay on target for IM, I was scared shitless of race day. I worried about the unending pain, the heat of the Arizona desert, running my first marathon, and my history of dehydration. My confidence in my physical ability increased throughout the training, but even on race morning I knew there was a good chance I would end up in the medical tent with an IV in my arm, and a DNF on my record. Fear kept me going strong for 14 months - it's one hell of a motivator.

Today is the start of my second week back to training. It's been easy stuff so far, short easy runs, test sets in the pool, and a single ridiculously short bike ride on saturday. But somewhere along the way I lost my fear, and my motivation has waned. I still have goals, but I noticed that the nature of my goals has fundamentally changed. My goals have always been about proving to myself that I could complete something. Can I swim across La Jolla Cove? Can I climb a mountain? Can I complete a half marathon without walking? Can I ride my bike 100 miles? 200 miles? I always tried to be as fast as I could at everything I attempted, but that was never my focus. I was trying to prove that I could do it, not that I was fast at it. I'm not a world class athlete, and the idea that there are lots of people faster than me is easy to accept. I have never thought of myself as a competitive person - though I have some friends who might disagree!

2009's goals are a little different. They're less about completing events, and more about performing well in them. This is a radically different mindset than I am used to. It requires a more aggressive race strategy, and also more risky. My old "just complete the race" mindset caused me to think of a DNF as the worst possible thing that could ever happen. This idea leads to a very conservative race plan - save your energy in case you need it later. Of course I ended up tired at the end of races, but normally I felt fine a few hours later - or certainly by the next morning. This mindset also lead me to the most dangerous situation I've had during my triathlon career - I refused to quit on a 14 hour bike ride in the 120 degree California desert. Even after my legs cramped so badly that they could no longer support my body weight, I kept going. I eventually did call it quits that day - but I had passed the threshold of sensibility long before that point, and it very easily could have ended badly. With a performance based mindset however, things are much different. I need to "leave it all on the course", and I probably will take much longer to recover after a race than before. I also need to be ready for my first DNF in a race. If I'm racing on the red line, then my likelihood of misjudging is greater, and my margin for error is smaller. Is going faster worth risking a DNF? This is the year I find out.

So here I am, 1 week into a 10 month season - and I don't know what the hell I'm doing. I don't want to do anything, I'm going through the motions like a zombie. My workouts are easy, but I'm not doing them very well - even a 5 mile run hurts. I certainly don't feel like an Ironman. I've lost my appetite completely, and I'm only eating because I know that I need to in order to fuel my workouts. I went from training 20 hours a week a month ago, to only 7 hours this week - and all the spare time I have is boring me to tears. I started watching TV again, that evil succubus. I watched an entire season of Dexter this week. Spoiler alert: he's a serial killer and he spends the whole season killing people. Why did I waste my time on that?! God help me if I get sucked into watching the NFL again.

Here's hoping the fear returns. Maybe I'll find something new to be afraid of. Maybe the crazy weather and insane hills of Wisconsin will be enough to get my fire burning again. Maybe the idea of failure will drive me to the next peak. Maybe the threat of disappointing my coach and training partners will fuel me to excel. Or maybe I won't need fear at all? Maybe I'll find inspiration instead. I don't know what it is that will get me through my next 140.6 mile event - but the smart money is on me achieving what I set out to do. I don't like to lose.